Speechless

Have you ever had this feeling where you can’t comprehend the emotions you are experiencing? It is a combination of relief, contentment, excitement, and calmness.

There are always these moments that boggle my mind. I was raised to be a listener and expressing the thoughts that are running marathons in my head was and is still never easy. Writing them down can be challenging but talking about them can sometimes be impossible. This year’s word of “eloquence” is working well though because I have pushed myself to speak more about my ideas without thinking too much about how others will respond. I still filter a lot but I am less anxious.

I am speechless not because I have got nothing to say rather I am unable to describe what I usually feel. My brain is as complicated as my heart where the past, present, and future rambles together to find their place in my decisions. Sometimes, it is fun to wander in my head whilst thinking of so many possibilities on how one event can lead to the other and how the looking back gives sense to everything that is currently happening. It’s a crazy beautiful kind of day. I hope that you get to be mindful of what you’re feeling and experience the magic inside you. 

I mainly wanted to reach out to my readers and to remind myself that I am blessed to be living in this world full of lessons to learn. I feel fearless of whatever can happen and feel so hopeful with the endless string of probabilities. I am still scared but in a different way where I am just open to what may happen because I know that at the end of the day, it will be something that I will learn from.

I was an obsessive planner. I used to imagine in my mind on what was supposed to happen from start to finish; however, I learned that it’s not much fun. One time I heard or read from an article on how a kid was so disappointed but how he knew what the weather will be like for tomorrow. Would an adult have ever thought about that? It’s so interesting how we expect everything to be laid out for us while still having a desire to live a life filled with excitement. Where is the excitement in knowing what will happen next? There will always be disappointments but that is part of life. There can be so many reasons to get mad and angry at the world and the society but why would I when I can do something about it? It does not have to be grand.

The small gestures of respect and love is enough to live your life. If you were born with a vision then go for it. If you were born with warmness in your heart then do not be afraid to share this. If you were born with a talent then please, please do not be afraid of showing it. If you were born with a soft voice but a strong will then find a way.

The world teaches us how to numb down our feelings and lower down our voices but we were brought in this world for a reason. Whatever it may be, please never give up in whatever good you are doing. This popular video that spread like fire in all form of social media teaches us that we must not let our environment dictate our future. The judge was obviously surprised with how her good childhood friend resulted to theft. An answer will be societal standards.

I imagine a world where character precedes personality, morals before networks, and humility over pride. This may be an ideal state but so many people have fought for it, which means that it is worth fighting for. The world is becoming one, my friends. There are no more set standards or definitions ( I have yet to analyze whether this is a good thing or not ) that restrict us from becoming the reality of our dreams. Anything can happen now. Who knew these things like cell phones, laptops, airplanes, 3D printing, and many more inventions and discoveries will ever exist?

That is what I am feeling right now: hopeful but still, speechless

|| I will later write about where this inspiration came from, in a separate post about traveling. I still was not able to find the right words to describe the whole experience. There are a couple of drafts that I have started but nothing solid. It will be soon, loves! ||

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Illusions of Us

We all want to be happy. Everything we do we perceive to lead to happiness. We study hard to be seen as someone smart, to be accepted and therefore to be happy. We work so hard to be recognized and then promoted to receive a better salary, which leads to a better lifestyle and attainment of our either materialistic and non-materialistic wants and needs where these results to happiness. We work things out with our past because we want to fix everything and make everything smooth sailing in order to feel a sense of relief and security, which are also known to be associated to being happy. In life, I realized that I have planted my goals with the notion that these will provide me an uplifting emotion that will last forever. I want to be this ideal being who gets this dream job and have a perfect family to become a big somebody in this world. However, these are not the cases at most (or all) times. In my observations, every time that I set a list of goals, I have created a world of my own illusions.

the illusion that this position will make me happy this illusion that this opportunity will make me happy this illusion that this experience will make me happy this illusion that this thing will make me happy

The end goal must not be to become happy. In my opinion and based on the experiences of falling down and rising back up, I have understood the logic behind my ability to reach my desired state: inner peace and consistency. I needed to understand a very important lesson: I must not aim for happiness but personal growth. Everything that we do, once it challenges our belief and at the same time, aligns with our values, will become another path paved for us in reaching our destination. I noticed that every time I was able to accomplish a specific goal that I thought will bring me happiness, the more likely that I became disappointed because of the great expectations that this certain experience will satisfy my needs. I learned to let loose and trust myself more than the external forces of pressure to become this ideal person. It was a scary thought at times to know that maybe who I thought I should be does not reflect who I truly am.

I am supposed to be loud I am supposed to be ready to exclaim my achievements and sell myself I am supposed to be more aggressive and be less afraid of hustling I am supposed to network well to use them to reach my desired career

I am none of those. Just for the sake of having no regrets, I tried them out at one point of my life but then, I really felt awful later on. These characteristics did not reflect my values nor did they make me feel proud of who I am. I did not want to talk about so much of my accomplishments just so that I will be noticed or have that “edge”. I cannot and will not use my relationships for the very reason that they are useful for me. My relationships are all about substance, I keep them because they share a part of who I am and I value their thoughts.

We are made to be different; therefore, with different paths to choose. There is never just one way to be able to become our best versions. It can be really difficult and frustrating but so far.. from what I understood, in order to reach that genuine sense of fulfillment and happiness, I must be able to aim for my personal growth and everything will fall into its right place at the right time. Patience is the key. Most importantly, no matter what happens, always look back to notice the patterns that mirror your strengths and capabilities as an individual. Use these and hone them for these are the things that shapes our identity and reflects our uniqueness. Why focus on the darkness of the night when there are so many stars? Look for the experiences that will enhance your understanding of the world and of yourself. Invest your time wisely. Listen to yourself more than you listen to the world around you, you know the best for you; however, be open to new things and ideas as these contribute to broadening your creativity and imagination. Lastly, at the end of the day, we are who we are and no matter how much we try to become the persons dictated by the society as “acceptable” and “notable”, our hearts will always remind us of our innermost identity.

Identity speaks of our values. Identity does not indicate our worst habits nor our greatest fears rather identity reminds us what keeps us alive and enthusiastic about life. It is the main driver of why we continue to live and strive for the better and for the best of ourselves.

Perseverance

I believe that everything happens for a reason but how does that work when I also believe that in order to get to my desired destiny, I have to work as hard as I could. In every commitment I get involved in, I put in my 1000000%. What role does fate play in that belief? It can be quite complicated but for the past few conversations and small encounters with life that I have had, I was able to develop my own understanding.

I was talking with my grandfather yesterday and even though he repeats his stories at least 5 times (either because he was really happy to share it or to emphasize on it), he was able to stress how life happens as it is. We have no absolute control over what will and will not happen nor can we play with the relativity of time. He repeated how he saw his ancestors were taken away one by one and now, he knows that he is next but it does not stop him from living his life. I love him so much and am always amazed with the enthusiasm and perseverance he upholds in his daily life no matter what his past dictates. It was a rough ride for him to get where he is right now but he did not show how he was a prisoner of what had happened rather rather he represented the battles he have fought by becoming a dignified man of his own values. It was an inspiration to see and witness! 🙂

Life creates so much obstacles for us to surpass but aren’t those blessings in disguise? I had a class discussion where we were asked whether hard work can get us ahead in life. Of course, we had different perspectives.

  • Yes, there are endless possibilities, you just have to keep moving forward
  • It depends. The obstacles are different for everyone. Some were privileged to receive more than what they deserve. That’s life, it still has to go on.
  • No, this world is such a cruel place where there is no equity, whatsoever.

These were not exact answers but rather a summary of what was discussed. What can I say? In my opinion, the hurdles are there way before due to history and these are not something that we can just remove overnight. However, there are ways and that if I want to achieve something, I will keep working hard. It’s true, sometimes. Everyone is entitled to have a good life.

what can be our worst enemies? timing and luck.

Patience is good because once our ambitions take over our lives, then we lose track in who we really are: human beings. I learned this the hard way but opportunities are worthless unless we were able to apply what we have learned in our very own lives. I used to grab every single opportunity that passes me by and it was fun until I felt really overwhelmed with all the information I was trying to understand to be able to hold true in my every day challenges. We all have different paces. My reflective trait made it harder for me transition to reality. I knew that I will be more successful if I had the time to absorb what was thrown at me, especially if it was something new. I learned to understand the difference between what I wanted and what I needed. It was a struggle that made me stronger and let me become the person I am today and to become tomorrow.

Luck is tricky. My opinion? It’s all about the positive vibes and when do I experience these? I believe that one’s peace of mind comes from having to balance humility with confidence. Easier said than done but totally possible. When life throw rocks at you, build a castle, remember?? Stay true to who you are. Collect your thoughts and have a pro-active response in fighting your battles. Things may not always go as planned but keep moving forward and stay optimistic. Every little thing will be alright. 

If you have IG, you have to follow @thegoodquote. They’re so amazingggg! My fave as of the moment: “Never get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life.” ❤

With that being said, I want to update you with my adventures!! I just got accepted in our school’s Summer Study Abroad program. See you soon, Germany!!

Looking Back & Moving Forward

I can’t believe it’s already 2015!!!

Then again, I had a great ending on my 2014 doing karaoke all night on New Year’s Eve with the family and well, accidentally missing the countdown. It was so sad and hilarious at the same time because we have been singing to pass time to wait for the countdown. I guess we had too much much and as I reflected on it, I realized that it was kind of good that I missed it because then, the transitioning to 2015 will be smoother.

Why? Beside the fact that we were all genuinely happy with where we are and what we were doing without caring what the world was thinking, it was more of seeing the whole concept of a new year as a societal obligation. I always thought that New Years was the only event where big changes are seen as more normal but that is not true. Every day must be a new year. What makes New Year special is our opportunity to stop and reflect on what has happened the past year, appreciate the good things, and learn from the bad. Other than that, we must always seek good changes everyday since it takes time to get to that destination we have been hoping to arrive to.

After all the terrible and traumatic occurrences that our world has experienced, we must not lose hope. The problems we have encountered may be reminder that we have to work as a team and not for ourselves. As for calamities, it’s time to trust that everything happens for a reason. I definitely believe that it’s easier said than done but guess what? life must go on. I have been in a roller coaster this year but looking back at it, I wouldn’t be who I am today without those challenges.

Looking back, I have gathered 5 biggest realizations:

Never settle, have standards
Satisfaction must come from within
Be thoughtful, to care for something/someone important is never a weakness
Be as perfect as you can be, without any external influences
Knowing and loving who you are are prerequisites to being known and loved by others

I know that some of these can and will be misunderstood because of the variety of perspectives we all possess. I have written them without any explanations in order for you to reflect on them with your own vantage point. At the end of the day, what makes each one of us special and unique are our thoughts and ideas. Moving forward with my life this year, I wanted to take more risks and listen to my inner voice. It will definitely be a challenge but it will be a challenge that I want to venture on.

Travel
How? I am studying my hardest in order to get competitive grades because it will give me an edge in getting a once-in-a-lifetime experience and work harder to be financially ready for the expenses I will have to spend on. I really want to go somewhere soon to increase my international awareness in developing a more diverse outlook in life and my career. More than that, I have always desired to immerse in a culture not familiar with mine.. don’t even get me started with food cuisines that I get to try.
My top five choices: Korea, Taiwan, London, LA, and Germany

Invest on my growth
How? I will invest more time and efforts in attending effective workshops/sessions/conferences/events that will open me to the world outside my own and which will push me outside my comfort zone.

Read more
How? Allot time to read at least One book/month or at least 10 books for the year.
(Any recommendations?)

Work towards my passion
How? I love people, swimming, music, and photography so let’s see how that goes for me.

These are all rough ideas and plans I have for this year. I believe that when it’s the right time and when I have done the best that I could, everything will fall in its right place. Buckle up, my friends! I want to invite you to take this journey with me because life, as we know it, has so much more in store for those who dream big. I hope you continue to be hopeful for today and more tomorrows and you will never give up on your dreams to make this world a better place. 🙂

Happy 2015, wordpressers!!

The Tunnel Vision

For the past 21 years, I have seen myself aiming to reach so many stars while struggling to look at all directions. Some people would say that they have admired how much passion I put in everything that I do but I have figured that life is not just about goals and having a better future. No matter how repetitive you may hear this, the journey and not the destination matters most. 

As a perfectionist and an intuitive person, I always make sure to follow the plan and to not ruin it, which has sucked the life out of my life. I’m only in my twenties but I think as if I’m in my forties because of my future concerns like what would my retirement look like, where will my family reside, and how will I make sure that I take care of my parents when they get old. (and many more) My mom noticed this and she always remind me to focus what is in front of me and enjoy while I am still young. 

The fast-paced world makes everything seem like a never-ending roller coaster. The thrill is great but why not get off the ride and take the ferris wheel once in a while. Enjoy the ride, “like living slowly to take it all in” describes what I’m trying to say. Every moment counts. Maybe this is not just me so I will share some realizations that may potentially help my fellow wordpress-ers on this ongoing concern.

1. Do the things you have always wanted to try.

Life is short and that is not a joke nor does it portray a YOLO lifestyle. It simply means that we have not that long of time to live in this Earth so challenge yourself to live to the fullest every day. You don’t have to oblige yourself to go skydiving, travel halfway around the world, or hike that mountain your friends have gone to. You can but it’s not necessary. Explore your country/city, visit your grandparents to hear their stories, and read books that strengthen you can be some good realistic examples.

I have been in this city for 2 years now and because I have been too involved in school and building my professional life, I seem to lack “life experiences” and after some time, trust me.. I have witnessed people who have taken risks claim the biggest and most wonderful opportunities in their lives. How long have I planned to roam around the city to make memories, try different cuisines, visit historical sites, and meet amazing people. There is so much magic happening just around the corner.. and I am missing it because I am too busy to build my “career path”. How often do I get to be this young.

“You may be older than yesterday but you are still younger” than tomorrow so do yourself a favor and live a life you will be proud to have.

2. Do some planning

I have indicated some because even though you get to live once, you still have to understand the world and how to survive in it. As a twenty-something, I have practiced properly monitoring my budget and plan out my day to be able to accomplish some things that will/may help me later on in life. After all, no matter how much we would want our lives to be perfect and full of happiness, we still have to acknowledge that practical means can save us from bigger regrets.

Study hard. Look for opportunities to grow and strengthen your skills. Network.

Study hard because based on how I looked at things, grades still bring you to many places. I have seen how applications to study, teach, work, and volunteer abroad asks for your GPA. I have always thought that grades were a dictation of my own discipline in being able to focus on what must be done. I was raised in a family where education is a huge aspect of one’s life and I respect the reason behind it.

Opportunities to help you grow are everywhere, you just got to look for them. Accept the challenge of learning something new.. cook that mouthwatering pasta you have seen “In the Kitchen with Stefano Faita”, join an organization to support a cause that holds so much meaning in your life, try that kickboxing class that will help your fitness and health. There are so many things to get involved out there. Understand your community, partake in the world’s concerns, and contribute.

Network with people you admire. Network = Connect, Build, and Sustain Relationships. It is very empowering to be surrounded by open-minded people. It may take some time to sense which relationships will last but you will sense it. After all, the world won’t be what it is without each other’s help. Listen and be heard. 🙂

** There are so many aspects – physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, social, and financial – to consider that focusing on one thing does not help you in the bigger scope of life. Balance is the key, my friends!